I’ve been searching my brain to find a solution to Gage’s bad-mouthing of school. When we say anything like “it’s time to get up for school!” or “let’s do your homework” we hear nothing but disdain spewing from that cute little face of his. And it’s annoying. And no good for the Universe.

It’s wearing me down frankly. And over the last several weeks the homework battle has been horrible. I finally worked out a deal with his special ed teacher to give him a break between subjects (and folks, I’m not talking mounds of homework, I mean just practicing and writing down spelling words and maybe a grammar sheet and a math sheet) and also agree with his input on the amount of time it will take for a subject…say 15 or 30 minutes. This is work that he could do in well under 15 or 30 minutes, but chooses not to, so let me clear that up right here and now. If he doesn’t finish it within the time agreed upon then we are to put it away and he will stay after school to finish it with his special ed teacher. While we do this program we remain calm and collected and follow through. We know how to do that since we’ve been behavior modficationized by Gage’s behaviorist.

Since we started this program a couple of weeks ago he’s not had to stay after school. And his attitude about doing homework has improved slightly. When I say slightly I mean that he has gone from crying, whining, fighting, throwing pencils to just complaining loudly with a contorted face, which I ignore. Sadly, I see this as a vast improvement.

I know. My standards are low. Sometimes that is what gets me through the night. Low standards.

So now I’m moving on figuring out how to squelch the negative comments about school that come out of his mouth with such ease. I’ve tried talking to him about how he has a lot of years left to go of school and homework and we should find a way to make it manageable for him; just like his meds and all of his medical appointments. “We do okay, don’t we?” I say…”We work together to find a way for you to cope.”

Even a homework assignment of a book report (or Internet report as I like to call it) about a famous African-American person that was due Monday is a chance for him to balk. It was a struggle to get him to complete it over last weekend, but he did it after 1 (or was it 2?) trip to timeout. He said what he wanted it to say and I typed it in for him. He did a pretty good job once we got going.

That was until he learned that this particular person- Granville T. Woods – left school at age 10 to work in his father’s machine shop and was working on his own taking lessons from individuals at the age of 16 in his chosen field. Gage asked if he could quit school at age 10.

“Well no Gage, you cannot quit school at the age of 10.”

And then more whining about hating school.

Ignore. Or try to anyway.

So, the new amendment to the current plan is to have a board on the fridge for each child that will be marked up as he or Quinn tell me things they like/love about school. Anything at all. This is Quinn’s chance to get to be a good influence on her brother because the girl loves her some schooling. School is Quinn’s current passion and I hope to capitalize on her enthusiasm. I am hoping that Gage’s voicing some positive aspects about school (even if he doesn’t believe them) might resonate with him a little bit.

So. We are moving on to strategy #628 in the Gage Behavior Modification plan. The boy is truly a lot of work. Hard work. And sometimes not even fun work.

Ahh…mothering the “strong-willed” child.

I was such a better mom before I had kids.