Gage has has about 6 “good” days at school in his homeroom. Keep in mind this mark is on a sliding scale for him, as a “good” day for him is probably a not so good day for other kids. We think probably one of these days was a “gimme” since the teacher also wrote that she had to get onto him several times that day about listening. Because a reward of a Friday play date hung in the balance, we think maybe his teacher wanted to encourage the whole process and give him the stamp that day. Yesterday we learned he’s being very defiant in PE, which is going to totally piss off my sister, who is a PE teacher.
Quinn is doing pretty good at school by all accounts but has fallen into a few of the behaviors at home that Gage exhibits, and so we are on top of getting rid of those as they come.
We’ve been praising good choices A LOT and writing them on a chart. But I think we need a more systematic way of “rewarding” good choices. So I’m starting another chart. And then the stickers/check marks/stars/whatever are cumulative for little treats.
Gage had a hard time listening (sadly is the norm, because of his impulse control problem) over the weekend and Julian had to explain to him that is why he won’t be able to go to Scouting camp this summer where I know he would have a fabulous time. Julian explained that other parents, who would be responsible for taking him (parents would trade off) are concerned enough with his behavior that they won’t take him. I know it makes me sad. I think he really thought about it. That hits home, huh? Well, it hit me. And is further indication how far we have to go. It says nothing for how far we’ve come. It’s hard to remember how far we’ve come in the midst of being mortified (and tearful) that other parents have those feelings about your child. And well, because Gage’s behavior gets in the way of a lot of wonderful things for him.
But we had a great Sunday, with baby Tessa’s family in celebration of her baptism and Gage and Quinn both did awesome. Gage sat in church for over an hour without one behavior incident. Right before the baptism (at the end of hour and 20 minute service) I let him go to our Sunday school room where he did some arts and crafts and waited for us to pick him up. While this might not be a lot for other 9 year olds – sitting through service and then waiting for us in the room until after pictures – it is for Gage. Remarkable actually. Because usually he cannot be trusted to leave ahead and wait.
We talked all day how proud we were of both of them. The two mornings so far this week to get them off to school? In a word: challenging.
It’s a constant revolving door, this thing with behavior. It’s like the pop-up mole game…you get one and another (bad behavior) rears it’s ugly head. We’re never quite sure how we’re going to get them all, because all of them are annoying. But that mole sure is cute.

Bravo on the church! Sounds like a pretty impressive feat to me. I’m sorry about the scout camp though. There’s a kid in our HSing group who is a sweetheart but difficult to manage and he gets left out of a lot. It always makes me sad but I also know that I worry about keeping him and other kids safe so I’m as guilty as the rest of the parents in not calling him. Ugh. No good answers.
I bet if other parents would learn a few techniques then he could be included…but I understand being scared. But most of us parents with difficult kids welcome coming up with a strategy for such an outing with other people. Thank God for those few that aren’t scared to take Gage without us there. Also, outside of our element, he tends to do a tad better.
Call your scouting council office and explain the situation. They may have a program in place with Boy Scouts, Explorers or other scout camp counselors to assist kids at summer camp that may need less than a 4:1 supervision ratio. Can’t hurt to ask. I think I also used the councils, council and counselor too many times and probably in the wrong way but you know what I mean…
I don’t think my comment took – so here you go again: Call the scout corporate office and explain the situation. They may have resources available thru Boy Scouts, Explorers or camp counselors to help kids that need a better ratio of supervision than 4:1. Can’t hurt to ask …
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