I’m the first one to say that Gage is a challenge to manage. He’s easily distractable, he’s impulsive, he likes to be a clown and he likes to play tricks on people (mixed with the impulsivity can be, um, a CHALLENGE). I’m also the first one to recognize this puts Gage at a disadvantage relating to most things social and educational.

For the last few years when we’re trying to get the to facts of an “incident” at school, he is usually forthcoming. Gage will tell little tales here and there, but for the most part when it counts and we’re pushing, he will tell us the truth. He’ll confess to provoking or taking part in something he knows he shouldn’t have and so when he tells me a story that involves a “they didn’t believe me” thrown in there with “so and so pushed me…” I listen with great interest.

Gage now has the reputation with adults and peers alike of being the trouble-maker. He can rarely be in a situation with a group of kids and not get blamed for something. And honestly, sometime his behavior is just that of a typical 9 year old boy – he can get unruly when he’s in a group of other boys his age. But you know what? A rough-housing shove by Gage isn’t a rough-housing shove by another kid. How do I know this? Because kids and adults alike will call our attention to Gage when such an incident happens.

Look, I’ve done it. I’ve blamed Gage and have had to apologize to him for jumping to the wrong assumption, involving Quinn or a friend. It’s not hard to blame Gage, he’s an easy target.

He has a reputation.

Besides the obvious annoying nature about this is that we manage Gage pretty closely. He doesn’t get much wiggle room in large crowds of kids or when a situation could escalate (you know, lots of activity, with more than a couple of kids). We rarely leave his side, specifically because we can tell when an incident is brewing.

But you know what? It doesn’t matter. Last week I took Gage with Quinn for a quick event with her Brownie troop and I left her in capable troop hands and brought Gage to the back yard where there were three kids playing. There was a trampoline WITHOUT A SAFETY NET around it so I monitored the situation closely. There was a boy who Gage knew from school and when I said something about making sure no one gets hurts so we wanted to jump carefully and maybe just one-at-a-time, a boy said something like, “Yeah, Gage is rough and wild and he gets in trouble a lot.”

Just one example of the tide that is his reputation.