In list form because then I don’t really have to be coherent. I know you understand.
- When I woke up I realized Gage wasn’t in the house and I started to cry then Quinn said, “Mommy!” and I said, “Good morning Quinn!” all excited because she had a performance at school this morning and she deserves for me to be happy about her waking up to perform. Which was extremely adorable, by the way.
- Many people in our Village are offering their love, support and prayers. Along with food and help and wow, again, after having just called on all of that for Quinn’s transplant you still want to help and I’m overwhelmed with love and warmth. Your love surrounds us like a blanket.
- Already working on next steps for Gage’s IEP stuff. One thing I know, until we have a meeting about the recent incidents and without the team having more information (which I am not willing to share here yet) it is way too early to speculate on where Gage will go to school when we returns. I believe that with proper meds, an adjusted IEP, therapy support increased and more understanding about what is truly going on with Gage, that our school can serve him. But there will obviously be changes to his IEP. But speculation? Not good.
- What do we need? Prayers, love, support, understanding.
- Quinn hurt her foot last night and I thought it was broken, then I thought it wasn’t. Then I was going to take her to the hospital but she had a performance this morning at school and so we said, if you can go to school, great. If it’s too hard to walk, we will take you to for an xray. She can walk on it, it just “hurts real bad.” But still.
- I have a meeting with the social worker and Gage tomorrow at 2:30. Apparently it was a rough night for him. A safe room, with one-on-one care, which he desperately needed. Today was better, even without sedation, but still bouts of anger/lashing out. However a new med is being started this afternoon, so I’m anxious to hear if that helps him in the short term.
- Julian and I are doing okay. I am joking when he’s upset, he’s joking when I’m upset and so it balances out. We did have one fight about a fax of all things. It lasted about 20 seconds when HE REALIZED I WAS RIGHT. Yeah, he’s great like that.
- I am without a doubt running on pure reserves. Reserves I guess that I’ve stored up since Quinn’s kidney transplant 3 1/2 months ago. Is that enough time to store reserves? Hell no. Which means I’m in negative reserves.
- I spoke with Dawn earlier and it was good because I can make really inappropriate jokes about my son and she can handle it. Not so with Grandma, I’m sure.
- Wow am I glad for my work. Honestly. I’m not just saying that because some clients read my blog either. It makes my life seem normal when I can do my normal things.
- We’ve cried a lot in the last 24 hours. A lot. Some from sadness, some from relief, some for each other, some for our family, but all for Gage. Wanting so deserpately to help him have some peace and happiness. Like the kind of happiness from cereal boxes which sadly always eludes him, no matter how much we try. Sure, he can be happy about a thing or an activity. But true blue happiness? Not seen that for a while. Too long if you ask me. But I’m just his mom.
- The good thing about him being in treatment is that the doc gets to see the worst. One thing his other med doc didn’t. She is very conservative and didn’t always want to act on what we told her about Gage. But this doc? He’s treated kids like Gage and that gives me great comfort.
- Must go, because really, I’m taking my girl to the hospital for an x-ray. BECAUSE MY LIFE IS CRAZY.
All typos and crappy writing must be forgiven today.
I am just so full of hope and wish I could throw just scads of it your way along with some of my reserves because, girl, you are running on fumes. FUMES!!! Remember tomorrow night you can lay around and be comatose!!! I will be very anxious to hear about the social worker mtg. Very. Anxious!
Also you are the best I know at inappropriate humor besides Abby. Pennie is pretty good, too, but you and Abby rock the inappropriate! We really have to get you crazy kids together!
I love you and am here for you. Thinking about you all.
Jeez. Poor everybody. I hope Quinn’s foot ends up to be nothing serious, because you deserve to have SOMETHING not be serious.
Thinking of all of you.
I’m so glad to hear you like inappropriate humor because that is, in my opinion, the best way to deal with crises.
Lots of praying and lame-ass cyber hugs ((((Julia)))). So effing cheesy.
Now I understand the picture on FB. Hope Quinn’s foot is on the mend soon… How was her performance? I’m sure she was a superstar on stage! Sending all the positive juju I can find your way!!!!
You are in my prayers.
Hey Roberts-Just heard about Gage today. We have had some medical issues with our son Daniel the last few weeks that have totally consumed us. Just want you to know that the church knows, and I know, and if there is anybody’s prayers God listens to, it’s this North Decatur congregation–an amazing crowd. I hurt for you. And I pray for you too. And I’ve got feelers out for Buddha, the Dalai Lama, Easter bunny, and Santa Claus too for some special attention to Gage and the rest of you.
I cried a little too today, reading last night’s entry. I’ll have you know a bunch of Lutheran yankees have Gage on the list for Prayer Team. I’ve been saying them too. Wish I was closer to bring my world famous meatless stuffed shells.
I know it’s hard, but you’re doing the right thing for him. xoxox (inappropriate humor is sometimes necessary, nothing to forgive!)
Praying for you all. I really hope hospitalization brings Gage a pathway to peace and happiness.
I am so sorry about all that is going on. I have commented a few times over the last couple of years but haven’t recently but I want you to know that you and your family are in our prayers.
There have been times when I thought that we would have to admit my 11 year old son to a psych ward and it is so scary to realize that you would be willing to do that to see your child get the help he needs. You and your husband are doing an amazing job with your beautiful children. Hang in there! We will keep praying for you!
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